A Dark and Stormy Night
by Batfan3
Summary: Artemis Fowl II. Juvenile genius, fairy trapper, savior of the People (on numerous occasions)…and big brother to two troublesome twins. Yup, reduced to headache-inducing babysitting. Brilliant. Of course, the appearance of an old friend during a fierce storm tends to make things a bit more interesting… Rated K friendship/family


**Hi guys, just a little oneshot I cooked up. Some friendship, some fun, and a hint of Holly x Artemis. Enjoy!**

Artemis Fowl was not happy. Not. One. Bit. For one, his parents were on a business trip to Paris, and he was charged with babysitting the twins, and secondly, Beckett had 'accidentally' tripped and fell on his hand-held electromagnetic-phase-disrupter, effectively smashing it.

And to make matters worse, Miles had been an absolute _pest_ all day, taking on that incredibly annoying 'I-know-everything' type of air. In addition, one of the businesses he was managing were giving him trouble. And on top of all that, he had a massive headache.

After taking two pain killers, he went to his lab and closed and locked the door, leaning against it with a sigh. Rain poured down outside and thunder and lightning crashed. Poor bloke who had to be out in that.

Then his chair spun around, revealing Miles, who looked extremely smug.

"You know, replacing the electromagnetic-phase-disrupter power core with a-"

"What are you doing in here?" Artemis interrupted, trying to stay calm.

"The door was open."

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "No. The door was not open. It was closed and locked."

Miles shrugged. "Same thing."

"I've told you precisely 246 times to _not_ come in here," he said slowly. "So don't come in here."

"247."

He growled and stocked forward, grabbed Miles by the collar and pulling him from the chair.

"Out!"

"Beckett hungry!" A cry came from around the desk.

He groaned. "You're both in here?" He opened the door. "Butler! Butler!" Butler appeared in the doorway. "Please get them out of here."

"Aren't you supposed to be watching them?" Butler asked.

"I just need a moment or two." _Or ten._

Butler nodded and ushered the boys out, closing the door behind him. Artemis sighed and collapsed into his chair. He remembered life before the twins perfectly, and he loved his little brothers very much, but Beckett was bothersome and Miles was just like, well, like him.

Before Holly anyway.

He stood and crept out, he glanced into the boys' nursery where Butler was keeping a dutiful eye on them while Miles fiddled with a robot he was making and Beckett was making a mess of his food.

He shook his head and passed by. _I need something…a distraction, some type of distraction._

At that exact moment the doorbell rang.

 _Who on Earth would be dumb enough to be out in_ this _weather?_ He wondered.

Artemis glanced back towards the nursery but settled on simply answering the door himself. He opened it, unfortunately allowing in a gust of wind and rain. Someone fell through the door on top of him and they both fell to the floor with a rather undignified yelp.

"What is the meaning of-" He broke off abruptly, recognizing the unexpected visitor. "Oh, hello Holly."

"Hello Arty."

They were incredibly close, Holly being on top of him in the attempt to rise. Both pairs of mismatched eyes met and they both realized their intimacy and tried to rise in a scramble of unbalanced limbs.

"Er, sorry-"

"Whoops!"

"Oh bother-"

"Sorry."

"Okay don't move," Artemis commanded, then detangled himself from the small fairy and scrambled up, helping her up as well. They were both quite red and now Artemis was all wet. "What brings you to Fowl manor on a night—Holly you're hurt!" He broke off suddenly, seeing the red gash on her side.

"Just a run in with a rogue troll," she said, but she was pale and he could tell she was in a great deal of pain.

"Why aren't you healing?" He asked.

She grunted, leaning against the wall. "I may or may not have used up my magic on a very wounded human."

He picked her up easily, despite her vocal protests, and carried her to the kitchen. He was by no means a strongman, but he was a good deal stronger than before and he could carry her small frame easily.

He set her down on a chair and pulled down a first-aid kit and set to cleaning and bandaging her wound.

"You're lucky. Any human would die from a wound like this," he said.

"Than it's good I'm not a Mud-man," Holly replied, then grunted.

"Sorry." He did it more gently. He'd studied medicine and was more than capable of wrapping a wound like this one. When he was finished, he threw away the bloody cloths, washed his hands and put away the kit.

"You know the Artemis of a few years ago would simply have closed the door," Holly remarked.

"Not necessarily, if that Artemis suspected financial gain he wouldn't," she looked at him. "But your point is taken," he added.

Holly examined the bandages. "Thank you Arty." Then she looked him up and down, finally noticing his out-of-norm clothing. "Erm, what are you wearing Artemis?"

He glanced down at his clothes with a sigh, he wore jeans, sneakers and a t-shirt. "I promised my mother I would wear the clothes she bought me for my birthday. Thankfully she allowed me this plain black t-shirt, the previous one had garish writing."

"How did she manage that?" Holly asked.

"She tricked me," he replied, somewhat bitterly. "It was when we were miles beneath the surface in Iceland and about to die. So I promised before I had learnt the exact request."

She nodded. "Ah." She stood, then wince, placing a hand on her midriff.

"Do you need something?" He asked, surprising even himself with this question, bordering on caring.

She looked up. "Are you alright Arty?"

He cleared his throat. "I'm quite fine Captain, thank you very much." He went to the pantry and removed a mixture he'd only recently learned how to make, the day before to be exact. Beckett had been clambering for cocoa and Miles had been commanding it (no surprise there)

"Where're your parents?" Holly asked.

"They are in Paris on a…business venture," he replied. "And Butler is watching the twins in the nursery."

"No wonder you were pale when you first answered the door," Holly remarked. "You were charged with babysitting." She smirked. "I've had quite a bit of experience with babysitting Mud-boys."

"And obviously I have experience in fixing fairy problems," he returned, a weak come-back but it would suffice. He placed a pan on the stove and began mixing the milk and chocolate.

"Artemis Fowl II cooking?" Holly asked in mock surprise. "Call the LEP commander, raise the guns, he's gone mad!"

"You are LEP," he pointed out.

She shrugged. "Same effect."

When the cocoa was done, he poured it in two cups with careful precisian.

"Here you are Captain Short," he said, holding out. "Perhaps you'll be better at sipping cocoa than fighting _a_ troll." He took a sip of his. "Hmph, to much chocolate."

She smiled. "There's never such a thing as to much chocolate."

He looked at her out of the corner of his eye, analyzing her reaction as she tried it. Her eyes widened fractionally, then she looked at him.

"Not as terrible as I expected," Holly said, then threw him a sly look. "You're nod bad Artemis Fowl II, for a Mud boy anyway."

"You're not to bad yourself Captain Holly Short."

She raised an eyebrow at the compliment.

"For a fairy anyway."

 **Thoughts? Share them in the little box down there :D**


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